TL;DR
Physiologically, humans are designed to do hard things
But we have barriers
The amygdala keeps our bodies in check
We are addicted to dopamine
DARE is the strategy to overcome the barriers
D - document your objective and tell someone
A - write down your assumptions
R - review your plan
E - evaluate your worst possible outcome; can you live with it?
Now get started
It was 4 a.m. September 27th, 2019.
I was standing in the dark in a parking lot at the North end of the Westcoast trail, a remote 75km trail on the west coast of Vancouver Island.
The trail is typically a 7-day hike, but we decided to run it in one day.
As the tail lights of our support crew disappeared into the night, there was only one way to go: South.
With 3 hours till sunrise, we departed.
An hour into our adventure, we encountered a territorial Barred Owl who was clipping our heads with its talons. We swung branches above our heads for the next hour to discourage the owl's ariel attack.
We survived our first wildlife encounter, but it wasn't the last challenge we would face. Over the next 16 hours, we had many hurdles to overcome.
The mud was often knee-deep on the trail.
Once the tide went out, we decided the continental shelf would be better. The shelf was firm, fast and grippy as we ran across the barnacles.
Unfortunately, we missed the entry back into the trail, which added an extra 10 km to our adventure.
Staying on the beach meant crossing raging river outflows with rocky river beds and freezing water. With our tired legs, we must have looked like baby giraffes learning to walk with roller skates on our hoofs, shuffling on a sheet of ice.
We had to head back into the trail as the tide began to flood, but we were sure we could get around the last rock pile. As we were rock hopping, our lead runner screamed.
It was not the scream of a strong, vibrant man; it was the scream you hear from the female star of a horror movie.
We caught up to him as he was wiping off his face.
What he thought was a rock squirted him in the face with water. It was a dead seal with killer whale puncture wounds on its side. I am sure you can imagine how that water smelled.
Our final feat was to cross the Port San Juan inlet in a canoe to get to Port Renfrew. Luckily, our expert support crew, though a very suspect canoeist, was waiting for us.
After 85 kms, 18 hours and 97 thousand steps we finished. It was one of my life's most challenging and exhilarating days.
There are many incredible stories of humans doing hard things, and I proved to myself that physiologically, humans can do way more than any of us think we can.
So, why do so few of us take on significant challenges?
There are two significant barriers: our brains, which were programmed long ago, and modern society.
Let me explain.
Our brains are evolutionary marvels.
Although our physiology allows us to do hard things, our brains have learned that to survive, we must prioritize safety and avoid risk. The brain has learned to preserve the body; although we can, our brain does not want us to.
The amygdala is the part of the brain responsible for perceiving emotions such as anger, fear, and sadness. It also helps store the feelings associated with memories of events so that an individual may recognize similar events in the future and instinctually respond.
A perfect example is the fight-or-flight response. Our ancestors learned to run when the bushes rustled. The brain associates rustling with danger, so the response was to run, knowing the fight was futile.
In North America, we don't have the same physical threats as our ancestors did, but we have social threats. The fear of failure or judgement prevents most people from taking the risk associated with the unknown, which are all primary characteristics of doing hard things.
For example, a client admitted to staying in a suboptimal role with an organization because she hoped she would be valuable in the open market. Her fears were irrational and baseless, yet they guided her behaviour.
To achieve hard things, we must learn to be quiet, sometimes ignore the dialogue in our heads, and allow the physical body to take over.
Though we can blame our ancestors for our cranial programming, a more recent phenomenon is the dopamine-fused, instant gratification-oriented modern society.
North American society promotes a culture of instant gratification through various channels, including social media, consumerism, and entertainment. This culture encourages individuals to seek quick fixes and immediate pleasures rather than investing time and effort in pursuing long-term goals or enduring hardships.
As a result, many people need help to delay gratification and persevere through complex tasks or challenges.
Hard things take time, patience and a healthy dose of resilience.
Whether building a business, deciding to be healthy, committing to making relationships work or overcoming personal limitations, it all takes hard work over an extended period.
Angela Duckworth popularized the notion of perseverance: "Grit is passion and perseverance for long-term goals. It's the ability to stay focused on the task and persevere through setbacks and failures."
I witness grit's impact, or lack thereof, through my strategy consulting.
Strategy is inherently uncertain and plays out over time. It can take a long time before success occurs. One company, in particular, toiled away for ten years on a concept that needed the right market conditions to scale.
The idea and business model were sound, and when market conditions shifted, they seized the opportunity to scale. Now, they are growing like crazy.
But this is no overnight success. Perseverance, unwavering belief, and management's discipline of delayed gratification have led to the company's success.
How do you overcome these barriers?
If you have the resolve to achieve hard things but want to overcome the forces working against you, use the acronym D A R E.
D - document:
Write it down and tell someone.
Research has shown that you are 42% more likely to achieve a goal if you write it down and 62% more likely if you tell someone else. I recommend you do both. You will be 104% guaranteed to achieve your goal…..wait is that how math works?
A - assumptions
Detail your assumptions.
Write down all your assumptions, both positive and negative. For each assumption, answer the question "Do I know this as a fact?"
If it is a fact, write down the fact basis. If it is not a fact, determine if it is valid; hint that most factless assumptions are not valid.
Our brains create most of our assumptions, which doesn’t make them facts.
R - resolve
Create a plan
We overestimate what we can get done in a day but dramatically underestimate what we can achieve in a year. Break the significant objective into bite-sized chunks.
The rhythm of annual aspirations, quarterly themes, weekly tactics, and daily goals has always worked for me. Review progress quarterly.
Not every day will be up and to the right; don't have two bad days in a row and remember to be kind to yourself; if your brain thinks it, it is true.
E - evaluate
Determine the worst possible outcome.
As I was evaluating starting Edge Consulting I was asked, "What is your all worst-case scenario after one year?"
It was a bruised ego and $150K in living expenses if I could not generate even $1 dollar of revenue.
Then I was asked
"What are the odds of that coming true?" Very low
"What would you do if that happened?" I would get another job
"Could you live with that?" Yes
What did I have to fear if I could live with the worst possible outcome?
Now you are ready to tackle something hard, here is my call to action:
There is something you have been thinking about and suppressing for some time.
Pull out a piece of paper right now and write it down. Determine who you will tell, detail the assumptions that are holding you back, and think about the worst possible outcome questions.
What is your next best action, and when will you take it? Write that down.
You are on your way to achieve something incredible!
If you need help, I am here.
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